An Ode To Modern Thought

Descarted him away, he knew not the reason,

From pluralism and personalism’s once bright season,

He could smell the Bacon, though he be Locked away,

Behind bars where the sense of Hume’s heirs play.

Leibniz assured him, ‘tis the way it should be!’

For only a tail-Spinoza-rationality.

'Diderot a boat ever as sure?'

‘Hobbes on in!’ they yelled, ‘no water’s more pure!’

‘But I Kant!’ he explained, with judgment unclear

‘Such a Kant-tickle to freedom makes it hard to steer!’

It all seemed Kantumelious right from the start,

‘With the mind so Kantingent, I’ve lost sight of my heart!’

‘It’s the world outside where one should lay blame!

Let us dive deep in the mind, and Darwin the game!

Reality’s held by a subjective union of all,

And the objects beyond took a Schelling to fall.’

They told him, ‘Comte on, think positive my friend!’

But Hegel-erred with eyes of Fichte-hated contempt.

‘Why do we Nietzsche be so sure?

Are we not guilty of losing irrationality’s cure?!’

Husserl-ly man, who’s Brentano-wing the facts,

Can ill afford to look beyond the phenomenon’s acts.

So we’ll dig to new heights, with great vigor and vim,

And find even Christ had a Heidegger in him!


"...are we having 'pun' yet"...sorry